Little Moments
by CarlileLovesAnime
Summary: Little moments, that's all we ever had. Just little moments in which we really understood each other, and for once, I was actually happy. Random 5927 stories, mostly fluffy & angsty.
1. What's in a Name?

**And so my fanfiction endeavors continue. I hope these aren't just terrible. They're little stories based on my favorite yaoi couple in all of KHR, Hayato Gokudera and Tsunayoshi Sawada (aka 5927). Honestly, if these two don't get together or something by the end of the series, I'll just **_**die**_**. **

**I don't think any yaoi-loving person dislikes this pairing. I, myself am usually a yaoi hater, but for 5927, D18 and SatoshiDaisuke (D N Angel), I'll make an exception. (Maybe I love them so much because they're canon? But there are some canon yaoi couples that I **_**don't**_** like, too *pokes 8059*… I don't know.) **

**Anyway, on to the story now! I don't own KHR. **

**First up is "What's in a Name?", titled from a line in **_**Romeo and Juliet**_**, mistakenly one of the most "romantic" plays of all time. Read the damn play. It is not romantic. **

0o.o0o.o0

**What's in a Name?**

With the Sin in one hand and my other hand over my heart, I stared at the old man earnestly, my lips straight, my eyelids tired. The blood inside the vial was a haunting blackish-red and flowed on its own. I felt like I was holding another person just between my left thumb and fingers.

Grandpa's voice was determined and sturdy. "I, Tsunayoshi Sawada…"

"I, Tsunayoshi Sawada…" I repeated in the same tone.

"…Do solemnly swear…" "…Do solemnly swear…"

"…On my life and the legacy of the Vongola…" "…On my life and the legacy of the Vongola…"

"…To responsibly uphold the position…" "…To responsibly uphold the position…"

"…Of the Tenth Vongola Boss and Sky Guardian." "…Of the Tenth Vongola Boss and Sky Guardian."

Timoteo nodded, shook my hand firmly and moved on to the person standing beside me. I gazed emptily out into the awed crowd, exhaling in relief. It felt for a second like a huge weight came off of my shoulders, only to be promptly replaced by one that fell onto me from the heavens. I then focused on the swearing-in next to me.

Timoteo's moustache wiggled as he spoke, while the silver-haired boy in front of him held his large, weblike hand over his own chest.

"I, Marcello Hayato Bianchi-Fontanegra the fourth…" "I, Marcello Hayato Bianchi-Fontanegra the fourth…"

_Was that his real name? I actually figured before that Hayato Gokudera was an alias, since that's a Japanese name and he's Italian, but even so…_

"…Do solemnly swear…" "…Do solemnly swear…"

"…On my life and the legacy of the Vongola…" "…On my life and the legacy of the Vongola…"

"…To responsibly uphold the position…" "…To responsibly uphold the position…"

"…Of the Tenth Vongola Storm Guardian."

"…Of the Tenth Vongola Storm Guardian." The bomber's Storm Ring gleamed brightly for a moment. He gulped when the Vongola Ninth nodded and shook his hand. A look of relief and tension similar to mine took Hayato Gokudera's face.

The silver-haired teen continued glaring straight forward. I don't think he noticed that I was staring at him the entire time, out of the corner of my eye.

0o.o0o.o0

I approached the huge wooden double-doors at the back of the party room, not only alone among all the people, but lonely. I remembered that Gokudera had disappeared from the scene shortly after all my Guardians, my Outside Advisor and I had sworn in, so when I was told by the Ninth Storm Guardian that Gokudera wanted to speak with me privately and was waiting in the tangent ballroom, I immediately headed for him.

Glancing about to see if anyone was watching, I gripped the smooth silver handle, opened the door, slipped in quietly and shut it behind me. Everything in the huge secret room echoed. The ceiling was painted with angels and adorned with gold, the walls ivory paneling, the floor finely polished wood planks. A large window exposed the whole night sky from the back wall, and the ballroom was serene and filled with a pale darkness; a beam of moonlight shined on Gokudera. He wore a full tuxedo, his hair was combed neatly and he sat slumped over the keys of a beautiful grand piano in the corner, his hands lying limply at his sides on the bench. His smoky green eyes were lost in the stars. In the white glow, he looked nothing but angelic, a solitary beacon in the quiet night.

I'm sure he heard me open the door, or if not definitely noticed my booming light footsteps as I walked in, slowly, towards him. I stopped. He wasn't moving.

"You… wanted to see me, Gokudera-kun?" I whispered meekly. Of course, in the big, empty room, my voice may as well have been a launching rocket.

His head turned sluggishly. He had a calm and somber expression on his face as he eyed me. "Yes."

I stayed in the shadows as I watched him arise, gracefully come at me. Our eyes met briefly. His looked as though he so desperately wanted to say or do _something_, but just couldn't, and was angry and upset and confused about the fact that he could not figure out why.

Then he lowered himself. It startled me at first to see him drop, but I steadied a little when he propped himself on the ground on one knee. His head was lowered – all I could see was the top of his gossamer silver hair. Then he took my hand in his.

I shuddered a little when I felt his lips curl around my knuckles. "Tenth…" he murmured. And he looked up at me with burning honesty in his eyes.

"Tenth, as my old self, I promised to be the Vongola Storm Guardian. And I promised on just the Vongola and myself. But that… made me realize something."

He placed his thumb over the back of my hand and rubbed back and forth lightly. "As Hayato Gokudera, being honest and open… I swear to _you_ that I will be _your _right hand man for as long as I live, be loyal to _you_, a friend to _you_, cherish _you_ and do everything in my humble, God-given power to make _you _happy, healthy and safe."

I swallowed loudly. My eyes began to sting. And suddenly, I cried out, "Who am I?"

His face tensed. His thumb stopped moving. "What?"

I took in a breath and sighed heavily, and I could feel my eyes bulging. "Who am I, Gokudera-kun? Who are you swearing to? You say you're Hayato Gokudera the Right Hand Man, you know who you are. But do you know who _I _am, Gokudera-kun? Do you know who you are swearing to?" I was nearly shouting it, and I didn't like that, but what I said just had to come out.

We stared at each other for a moment, his expression stunned, my face red and smeared with tears.

His head fell again.

There was silence.

I just stood there, my watery eyes set on him with less and less intensity. As I unconsciously kept my hand in his, I started thinking frantically, _Oh, no, what did I just do…?_

Time passed. The darkness became thicker. Gokudera kept his face pointing down. The silence and the buildup of my thoughts almost completely turned off my ability to listen in the great, silent room, and I was dangerously close to not hearing the most important thing of all.

"Ts… Tsu-una…"

It was faint. It was stuttering. It was magical. And with a great struggle, he completed my name.

"Ts-Tsuna-y-y-yoshi… S-S-Sawada… Tsunayoshi Sawada." He looked back up at me, pure truth and triumph in his eyes and in his voice, declaring, "I swear to Tsunayoshi Sawada! To be Tsunayoshi Sawada's right hand man as long as I live, to be loyal to Tsunayoshi Sawada, a friend to Tsunayoshi Sawada, cherish Tsunayoshi Sawada and do everything in my humble, God-given power to make Tsunayoshi Sawada happy, healthy and safe!"

The sound of my name escaping his lips, in that voice with the rasp and the over flowing emotion and the songlike Italian accent, was the strangest thing I ever thought I would hear. But I wanted it so badly. I was gushing out tears and choking back whines and gasps as he gazed up at me with that vigor I had become fond of. He held a pleading look.

I collapsed to my knees and slammed both my arms around him, burying my soaking wet face in his shirt collar. Hesitantly, he wrapped his arms back around me too, and we pulled each other closer.

Between my wails that bounced uncontrollably off the high walls and ceiling, I muttered into his neck, "That's it. That's all I needed to hear." A sniffle from the Tenth Vongola Storm Guardian echoed around us, too. The stars' twinkle carried the darkness away, and we became new, as Tsunayoshi Sawada and _his _Right Hand Man.

0o.o0o.o0

**Yes, I did definitely make Gokudera's full name up. I mean, come on, he's GOT to be using an alias. If he's really Italian, why is his name Japanese? It just doesn't add up. Oh yes, and there are four of him…**

**I just thought that'd be an interesting name to do, since: one of the meanings for Marcello is "war", Hayato means "falcon person" (which are kind of opposites), Gokudera means "prison temple" (not included but also opposites), Bianchi means "white" and Fontanegra means "black fountain." His whole name basically signifies a great internal struggle. **

…**Then again, Mukuro Rokudo is Italian, too, and his name is Japanese – but that's got to be fake! Who in the right mind would name their child "Corpse"? Even Mukuro's (lack of) parents aren't that stupid. **

**Ah… oh well. This is a Japanese anime, so what are you going to do? **

**Anyhow, I'll post the next chapter as soon as I get some more 5927 ideas down. BTW, these are all supposed to be out of order, not really to connect with one another – there is no ultimate storyline – and they will generally be one-sided, like Gokudera's love for Tsuna is unrequited and/or Tsuna loves Gokudera too but doesn't realize it or is too afraid to say so. :D **


	2. Cats and Dogs

**In a way, "Little Moments" is just a compilation of all my 5927 oneshots. They're still getting published, but at least they're not taking up a bunch of space on my story list – I don't want a million and seven stories (sorry, YG, I stole your special number). **

**Thank you to all who reviewed, faved, put on alert, etc. **

**Chapter two is called "Cats and Dogs." I don't own KHR, Gokudera or Tsuna. Akira Amano does. If you want to complain, go to her, not me. I will not be able to answer your questions – though, if you want to have a heated discussion related to KHR, I'm all ears. **

0o.o0o.o0

**Cats and Dogs**

Aoi's Grocery, next to TakeSushi, across the street from Dearly Divine Clothing. I knew this town and everything about it at the back of my hand. The Mango Inn just slightly down the block from Chinese a la Sato. Namimori was truly my home, the town I grew up in and, if I played my cards just right, would never have to leave. Turn the corner to find Nami Pet Rescue Shelter.

Walking these streets, the sun on my face, the crisp autumn air all around and my best friend at my side, I felt invincible. I felt like there was nothing else I would ever need to learn.

The Nami Pet Rescue Shelter was one of the only places I had never been. Since my mother was allergic to cats, dogs and just about every other creature with fur or four legs, I was never able to own a pet. Sure, I had Natsu, but he was a box animal, hypoallergenic, didn't count. When Gokudera and I walked past the place, we saw a cat sitting in the window, its green eyes glowing as it stared down anyone who came too close to the building, and two large dogs romping around behind a chain-link fence.

A lull had recently come in our conversation, so I watched the beasts at play for a little while. We were halfway down the street when I couldn't see them anymore. I looked straight forward again, shoving my hands awkwardly into my jacket pockets.

But those dogs could not escape my mind. "Gokudera-kun," I said, turning my head subtly towards him.

He looked at me right away. "Yes?"

I paused for a second, and then I asked, "Do you think that animals – like, cats and dogs – have feelings?" He and I just narrowly missed running into a street light.

His lips curved upward. "Of course, Tenth," he replied. "They're real, living creatures just like us." He twisted his watch around on his wrist until the face was visible again.

I took a big step forward to catch up with the longer-legged Gokudera. "But, uh…"

"Yeah?" he said.

This time, I looked him straight in the face. "But if a cat or a dog were to ever lose its master, someone it loved…"

He drew a breath. His face suddenly had color. It caught me off guard slightly, and I quietly gasped.

"…If it could cry, would it?" I finished.

Gokudera's smile gradually dissipated and his eyes went skyward as he pondered the thought. His head turned to the crosswalk up ahead, and I looked at it too, surprised to say I was just a little disappointed that he didn't answer me right away this time. I slumped my shoulders.

His voice was low and serious when he found his best reply. Cold, white smoke from the chilly temperature deflated out of his mouth just as the words did.

"Well, I know I would," he said.

I suppose there are still some things I could learn.


	3. Shooting Star

**Oh em gee! One of my best friends got me a Storm Ring for my birthday! I am **_**soooooo **_**happy!**

**Boop-boop-badoop :P Once again, shout outs to everyone who took interest in this story. As a special thank you, take a chocolate-chip muffin for reviewing/faving/alerting. **

**Ughhh I'm a little frustrated though lately. There is one 5927 story idea in particular that seems really **_**epic**_** to me, and I'm trying to write it, but words are not cooperating *pout*. Oh well. **

**Chapter three is "Shooting Star". I do not own KHR. (Ohey, that rhymes!)**

**LOL, short story is short. **

0o.o0o.o0

**Shooting Star**

Unfortunately, the only movement was in green, red or orange, or some other color. A faint hum accompanied the blinking spot of color as it drifted through the collective mass of dust straight above. And the water flowed, gently, gently, like the smoothest sound, away, but left us the white lights, standing endearingly.

My coat was loosely draped across his lithe shoulders, his shelter from the sharp weather. When a breeze danced by, his hair stayed like the starlight reflecting on the water, as unmoving rocks in the surrounding turbulence. Perfectly sure. Except you couldn't touch it – _could not_, because the flow wouldn't allow you, no matter how strong you were. It blew in my ear vehemently, taunting me. How I hated it, how it hurt.

How beautiful he looked with the moonlight on his flawless skin and the world dancing in his eyes. I split my attention between the sky and the Sky. Words caught themselves at the bottom of my throat and festered into pain. My fingers involuntarily rose to the cross strung on my necklace – the one he gave me our first Christmas – and tapped it, and I thought hard, letting out a long breath.

_Please, just one… for him, if nothing else, because he deserves it so much…_

Energy burst forth from his lips. His hand flew toward the heavens. I could feel his movement with my eyes closed. "Gokudera-kun," he sang, "Look, quick!"

Just as I opened my eyes, a last peek of our blazing white target streaked away. He lowered his delicate hand and let out a happy sigh.

And he looked at me with those eyes of his; those caramel-sweet eyes filled high with the hope and innocence I so deeply respected, wanted and protected, the ones I thanked God every day for being able to live on the same Earth as their owner, their impeccable, wonderful, amazing, incredible, frankly indescribable owner. He was wearing a smile, too, that made my heart melt. His tiny fingers gripped my coat to close further around him.

"We found a shooting star," he said. That magical face turned back to the black above, to be absorbed by the more worthy nothingness. "Make a wish!" His hands laid limply in his lap while his gentle eyes slid to a close.

I kept my desperate eyes on him one last second to try to soak in some, just some little amount of his magic before I smiled at the heavens. "Thank you," I mouthed.

The rest of the night was spent doing what we were doing before: hoping and wishing and dreaming into the sky, and chasing false lights of color. We never found anything else. But even one was good enough for his miracle; after all, he deserved no less.


	4. Rejection

**Just read chapter 321 – I am really hating Julie/Daemon right now! Like, I seriously want to reach through the page and gouge his eyes out with toothpicks every time I see him (poor Chrome)! I am **_**so sick **_**of Adelheid's boobs. And Tsuna's kind of pissing me off right now. Aside from all that, Hibari looks sexy with his new VG, does he not? *angry sigh*, now I've vented. But you gotta love those little "What If" extras at the end, eh? I laughed out loud at every one, especially the Chrome one (Koyo's kind of freaked me out a little though. According to his super-vision, the fish died a painful death?)**

**Chapter four: "Rejection". I don't own KHR. **

0o.o0o.o0

**Rejection**

_Gokudera's POV_

Keep your eyes straight ahead, don't look any other way, or of course they will suspect something. Stay completely still.

Mafiosi are like wild cats. They will not see you if you just _don't move_.

"Sho, Shmokin' Bomb Hayato," the man said, a thick cigar poised between his yellowed teeth, "It'sh come to my attention that you've been going around, doing favorsh for other familiesh." He pulled the cigar out of his mouth and held it between his fat fingers, then jumped right in front of my face, his sweaty forehead touching mine.

I didn't move a muscle.

"I thought you pledged your loyalty to the Lucchesi family," he said roughly.

"A hit is not a pledge of loyalty," I said. I blinked slowly, deliberately, and calmly inched back. "I never said anything about being loyal to the Lucchesi organization. It was only a gig, nothing more."

The man's eyes widened. He plunged back away from me again, tapping ashes off the cigar and sticking it in his mouth once more. "You little brat," he said. "You think you've got what it takesh to be a lone wolf in thish big cat world?" He took a hurried drag, yanked the cigar away, coughed and set it back in. "Jusht why the hell, then, would you take any offer, eh? Don't you have any pride, boy, any shenshe of loyalty?"

"Well, I am exploring my options," I replied monotonously. "Currently, I'm looking for a family to take me in."

The Lucchesi family boss' skin instantly darkened to pure red. He blew on his cigar, sending ashes flying into the air around him, hacked for a minute, then charged at me. "You, a family to take you in? Don't make me laugh!"

My expression didn't change at all.

"No one would want you!" he boomed. "You're a mafia whore: can't make up your mind about which family you're a part of! Agh, ha-ha-ha! Plus, you're part oriental, and we all know _that's _just useless, and – stupid kid, you're a pianist! That's all you ever will be!"

He lumbered out of the room with his big, booming steps, laughing heartily to himself on the way out. "Oh-ho-ho, a family – to take him in – oh yeah, that's rich, ho-ho-ho…" He gave me one last sarcastic wink before slamming the door shut, leaving me alone in the small, wooden, smoky room. And I still stayed totally motionless. So the hunt continued for the family that I would feel upset about getting rejected by.

0o.o0o.o0

_Tsuna's POV_

Rejection: it was a feeling I was used to, but it hurt every time all the same.

The white envelope contrasted bleakly against my black gloves, shivering in the wind. It had been torn open in the same careless manner that my heart had been torn apart.

What I found the worst was not the fact that I had known her for years, that she knew very well that I liked her a lot, or that she had told me before that she would indeed _love_ to go out with me, but that she didn't even take the time to try and _find_ me and reject me _in person_. She just lazily wrote a reply on the back of the letter and got one of her friends to hand it to me in the middle of class. If she had been decent about this at all, I wouldn't have felt nearly as down as I did right then.

My head hung low, I tried to take my mind off the letter by watching his and my boots trudge through the snow. Gokudera stayed in my shadow, perfectly matching my strides. We were walking rather slowly. He was awkwardly facing away from me, toward the iced-over creek that ran parallel to the pathway. When he sensed the intensity of my aura ebbing, he spoke.

"I'm sorry that Sasagawa rejected you, Tenth," he said solemnly.

I couldn't bear to look up at him. "It's okay, I guess," I sighed.

We turned a corner and stepped onto a bridge. We were generally alone now. The only sound around us was the crunching of snow beneath our feet.

A bare, pale, tremulous hand fell open in front of me. "May I see the note, Tenth?"

I slammed it into his palm. "Go ahead, take it," I said. "Take it away from me."

He took it away and pulled the letter out of the envelope. His mossy eyes quickly scanned the paper in its entirety, first reading my confession/offer on the front and then Kyoko's response on the back.

_Tsuna – I'm afraid I cannot accept your feelings. You're really not the guy for me. In fact, you're horrible. I'm not the only one who thinks so, either. – Kyoko_

Hands in my pockets, I slinked my head in the opposite direction. "See? She doesn't want me."

Half of the crunching stopped. Soon it stopped altogether. Curious, I looked up at Gokudera, only to see him looking down at the letter in his hands, biting his bottom lip.

I blinked. "…Gokudera… kun…?"

He rose his gaze to me. The note dropped to the ground, his hands now gripping my shoulders. Gokudera and I stared into each other's eyes, my expression one of shock, his one of desperation.

"Tenth," he muttered, "Do not listen to that letter.

"No matter what happens," he said, now faltering, "I want you to be able to promise me that at the end of the day, every single day, you can look in the mirror and say out loud, 'I am beautiful.' Because you are beautiful, Tenth. Don't you _ever_ let anyone make you think otherwise."

The glints in both our eyes now fluttering wildly, Gokudera gulped, shuddered, tensed up and bit down on his lip again. Then suddenly, his grip on my shoulders weakened and his hands fell off back down to his sides.

"I have to go," he said hurriedly. Without another word to me, he was gone, running down the sidewalk, past the streetlight at the corner.

I clenched my teeth. "Gokudera-kun…" I whispered, my eyes wide in awe as I watched him disappear from my vision.

Just then, I heard some other crunching in the snow. "Tsuna-kun?" A timid and all-too-familiar voice drifted up to my ears.

Kyoko Sasagawa, the girl who rejected me, stood right there when I turned around. She had a sorry look on her face. "Tsuna-kun," she said, approaching me now, "I-I want to apologize, for that letter. It's just, some mean girls in PE took it from me, wrote the reply and dropped it at your desk and wouldn't let me have it or see it. You know them, right?"

I just stared.

"Um… but I would really love to go out with you, Tsuna-kun."

She clenched her hands together when she was right up in front of me and smiled. I smiled back in disbelief, a white cloud seeping through my exposed teeth; but my smile dissipated slowly.

She cocked her head. "Tsuna-kun?" she asked.

There was a pause. I tensed up a little, almost grabbed at her hands and then sighed.

"Kyoko-chan…" She looked up at me with hopeful eyes. "…I'll be right back."

I ran off in the direction of the streetlight.

0o.o0o.o0

**Dude, that ending SUCKED! Sorry *sweatdrop* It seems so rushed, right? Anyhoo, I'm going to **_**try**_** and post a new chapter of this over the (three day!) weekend. **

**On another note, this Saturday is my sweet 16****th**** birthday partyyyy! (lol, like half a month after my actual birthday.) I'm so excited! **


	5. Therapy

**Party was awesome. I found the time to update (I should probably be doing my homework but I can't concentrate when I have a story idea like this in my head). Please enjoy. Thanks to reviewers & I don't own KHR. **

0o.o0o.o0

**Therapy**

My decline into semi-insanity was so _subtle_, even I didn't notice it until someone pointed it out to me. I denied it, too, when the subject came up. Either way, whether I accepted my… well, whatever it was, exactly, or not, I didn't expect to be here on this brown half-couch, surrounded by gray blah walls, staring up at a ceiling that was surprisingly _filthy_ while smoking my fifth cigarette and talking to an old hobo-looking man wearing a monocle. Spewing forth my deepest, darkest secrets wasn't exactly in my nature, so I felt _quite_ uncomfortable doing so in front of this complete stranger. Those diplomas on the back wall didn't mean _shit_ to me.

I inhaled the smoke sharply and coughed it out. It hurt to look straight upward at the arm of the sofa. Scowling one-sidedly, I flicked the ashes off the end of the cigarette and into the ashtray.

"I don't know, I just –" I stuttered out unconfidently, quickly, "– I guess I'm just conflicted, is all."

"How so?" the 'doctor' asked.

He crossed his legs and wrote a little something down while I shoved the stub of a cigarette into the ashtray and prepared another.

"Well… if I say what I want to say, then I can't do what I promised to do, and I would hate myself. But on the other hand, if I _don't_ say _anything_, I don't think I'll ever" – I took my first drag on the new cigarette – "be happy."

I ran my fingers through my bangs, and the man looked at his clipboard like he wanted to write it all down, but couldn't help but pause.

"Say what? To whom?" he said. _Is ask questions all he can do? Shouldn't therapists talk a little more than this, actually help me figure out what I'm saying instead of just making me say more? Or maybe my expectations aren't right._

The standing lamp behind the couch dimmed slightly, and I flopped my head on its side and looked at him. With a jolt, I managed to sit up while taking a drag again and releasing a rising cloud of gray. I set my elbows on my knees, slouching. Laughed a little. Took another drag. Flicked the ashes.

"You wouldn't understand." I shook my head.

His bushy mustache drooped as he scribbled down more notes than I thought anyone would get out of just that. He spoke while he wrote. "Young man, I'm a therapist – you're _paying_ me to understand."

The thumb and index finger of my free hand shoved themselves into the soft skin around my eyes. I felt almost tired. I realized I was shaking.

"I'm not paying you," I sighed. "The only reason I'm here is because my sister signed me up unwillingly, thought something was wrong with me."

He raised an eyebrow. "_Is_ something wrong with you?"

I smirked, a small amount of leftover smoke escaping through my open lips. "How the hell should I know? I'm the one in therapy." If this man didn't have such a lack of personality, he'd probably be rolling his eyes – or at least, I prided myself in thinking I'd make him do that.

My head spun during the silence that followed. I hunched my shoulders and shuddered.

His voice faded out of the quiet. "You still haven't answered my question."

I looked up and met his hard brown eyes, sucked on my bottom lip and tensed up, rocking slightly to and fro.

At the uttering of these words, I then looked away. "His name is Tsuna." I took a drag on the cigarette again. "And in a perfect world, I would have told him a long time ago that I love him."

He watched me for a little longer, nodded and wrote down my response, along with some other observations.

In my head, I was reaching out all around me, wildly grabbing at the words that just came out of my mouth, wanting to catch them and swallow them back up. _Maybe this is what therapy is supposed to feel like. _I awkwardly laid back down.

"If I give you five bucks, would you end this meeting right now?" I asked.

"I'm afraid not," he responded without looking up at me.

"What about twenty to shoot me in the head?"

"No."

I flicked the ashes off the end of the cigarette. "…Dammit."

0o.o0o.o0

**While writing this, I pictured regular Gokudera, though I guess it could possibly be TYL, too. Depends. **


	6. Symphony of Perfection

**Okay, sad chapter is sad. Um, yeah. Don't own KHR :P**

0o.o0o.o0

**Symphony of Perfection**

From four to eight, Marcello Hayato Bianchi-Fontanegra IV (**A/N: **Return of the name! Dun-dun-dun!) was known lovingly by the music world as the legendary "Mozart of the Modern Age". He was gifted, truly gifted, and contended with the greats like Beethoven, Bach, Chopin and Rachmaninoff, mastering their works and twisting them into his unique style, as well as creating his own memorable music. He knew a masterpiece when he heard one. Music was art, music was the purest expression of his soul, music was his first love. It became his life. There was nothing more beautiful to him than a well-played piece, full of life and passion and mystery and unshakeable dignity. He could always see the person and the emotions behind a song. In fact, a song wasn't just a compilation of noise – it was a living, breathing creature, to be nurtured and loved just as anything else deserved to be. Music moved him more than anything. And when he would sit at that piano, he would shut his eyes and breathe in the undetectable scent of genius, and his fingers would fly across the keys as he poured his heart and soul into every note, every movement.

He ran away from it all then, and he regretted it the moment the realization of what he had just given up came to him. Tears built up and fell from his eyes and they did so every night for years. But he couldn't turn back. No one in the right mind would. And so he left his piano to gather dust in a big, empty ballroom, never to be touched or loved by anyone again.

Hayato Gokudera couldn't quite put his finger on it, but something about the Tenth made him a masterpiece, himself. He really didn't get it. He never would quite get it.

Tsuna was a symphony of perfection. He was beautiful and he was the only actual living thing Hayato ever came to love. His brown hair in soft spokes, his elegant brown eyes that reflected into his soul, his smile that warmed the air and silenced the agony of the world, his nose that scrunched up when he made that smile, his thin neck, his lithe shoulders, his narrow waist, his slender arms and legs, his gentle hands, his smooth skin – literally _everything_ about him was infallible – his sweet-like-candy voice, his quiet, shallow breaths, his tender embrace, his shy kisses, all those little cute expressions he made. Tsuna became Hayato's new favorite instrument. Hayato gave Tsuna his heart, and Tsuna gave Hayato his. They were so in sync that they knew everything about each other and filled each other's minds with splendorous fantasies and emotions that for Tsuna had never before come out, and for Hayato had stayed untapped for a very long time. Tsuna was art, Tsuna was the purest desire of his soul, Tsuna was his second love. He became his life. Hayato promised himself that he wouldn't slip up again, that he would never leave this love no matter what happened, because this was way too good for him.

Hayato never did leave Tsuna. It was the other way around.

A second gaping hole was left in Hayato's heart when Tsuna died. When he saw that bullet go straight through Tsuna's head, he didn't make a big, dramatic show out of it: he didn't cry, he didn't run to him and hold up his head and scream "Don't die on me, Tenth, please!", he didn't collapse to the ground and swear he was going to kill himself, he didn't react to the killer… he didn't do anything. He just stood there in shock, his mind numb and his body barely standing. Police came zooming through town at the sound of the gunshot, and by the time they arrived the killer and many witnesses had left the scene. They only encountered Hayato Gokudera and his dead lover. The scene was cleaned up and staged immediately. Some of the officers approached Hayato to ask him questions, but he never answered them. They kept him for days at the station, and when he proved to be no use to the investigation anymore, they dropped him off at an insane asylum, where he spent months and months going about the white rooms like a muted zombie. One day, in the lounge room at the asylum, where he was mindlessly seated on the couch with some other patients, not saying a word to them, Hayato got up, walked over to the piano in the corner, sat on the bench before it and played like he had never played before.


	7. Take Me Home Part I

**Haha, wao… it's been a while since I've updated this story, has it not? XD Oh well. **

**Enjoy this, please. I've been battling writer's block lately – it's bloody, there's carnage everywhere, and I've lost most of my troops. Hopefully this will pull my forces through to win the fight. **

**BTW, this is actually a two-shot. Yay! A little background: Tsuna & Gokudera are 17 and in high school. Tsuna has been the Tenth Boss of the Vongola for about 2-3 years now. Gokudera has been his friend and his loyal, hardworking right hand man this entire time. (And nothing more.) But lately, Tsuna has noticed that Gokudera's been behaving a little weirdly, like he's been standoffish and ominously quiet. Thus the story begins. **

**I don't own KHR. Akira Amano does. (Lucky.)**

0o.o0o.o0

**Take Me Home (Part I)**

Fretfully checking my watch for the umpteenth time, I paced about the meeting room, holding the side of my head with one hand.

"Where _is_ he?" Rosemary asked. Her red hair was pinned up in a tight bun and her glasses were perched perfectly across her face – she looked quite scholarly. We had to look professional, though. At quite a younger age, we had a slight disadvantage. "We can't afford to cancel with these guys."

"Don't you think I know that?" I retorted. The Celli family was one of the Vongola's most important – and volatile – allies. This meeting between we of the Vongola (Rosemary, my secretary, Basil, my outside advisor, Hayato, my right hand man and of course myself, the boss) and the uppers of the Celli had been scheduled months ahead of time. Leonardo Giardi, the boss of the Celli, was known for his temper, and he was looking forward to meeting us a lot.

Basil could only sit there and keep him occupied with conversation for so long.

I leaned in close to Rosemary. "I'll go look for him," I whispered. I headed for the exit.

"Hurry," she said back. She shut the door behind me.

The first place I looked was, incidentally, the only place I had to look. Hayato's room at this fancy old inn was empty, everything in its place. It was as if he weren't even there. But the French doors at the back were open just a crack, and that clued me into the fact that he was out on the porch.

It was misting lightly outside, the precarious state of weather somewhere between stillness and a subtle drizzle. Over us, there was pure black, but it faded to a lighter and lighter gray until, somewhere in the obscurely far distance, it shined just like normal, just like things weren't so bad here at all. In the breathing wind, he stood at the edge of the porch, pale hand tight on the stone balustrade, staring at that faraway bright sky. He was wet in splatters. Some grainy spots on his clothes were darker and clung to his skin. He was barefooted, and he looked as though he tried to dress up, but he was without a tie or jacket now, his collar unbuttoned halfway down his chest. His mossy eyes reflected the curves of the clouds.

I froze and stood in the half-open doorway, studying him, honestly not sure whether he noticed me or not. The humidity in the air made it hard to breathe, but I didn't really get wet. The wind was especially strong back here, though. Eventually, I stood up straight and took one slow step at a time toward him in my stiff black shoes. My footsteps sounded soft on the raw slate. I almost opened my mouth.

"I hate this," he said.

I stopped. His voice was abnormally deep and level, clear in the cottony air. My neck extended slightly.

"I hate this. All this. I'm sick of it."

My eyelids pushed together through the thick vapor and then pulled apart again. "What do you mean?" I asked.

He turned around and only then in the full view of it all could I see the sullenly guilty expression on his face. He gave a little half-smile that faded quickly, which was the most content he had ever managed to look lately.

"Tenth… there are a lot of things you don't know about me, about my past. And I think it's really best for both of us that you never know," he said, his eyes drooping. "And before I say anything, I just want to make this clear to you: you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. You're my best friend and a better boss than I could ever have dreamt of. This has nothing to do with you. Okay?" While speaking, he had begun to come closer to me.

I swallowed and nodded, feeling the sudden brush of wind push against me.

Hayato let out a little sigh, like he was relieved. "It's just…" He paused looked down. "Ever since I came here to Japan, ever since I met you…" Quickly he turned around and walked with purpose back to the railing, where he slammed his hand down and poked his head out past the cover of the roof and into the rain that was increasing in strength, his back to me completely. I heard him curse under his breath.

In seconds, I was at his side with my hand placed reassuringly on his shoulder. He was tense, wired. I could feel it. Maybe this was new; maybe this was how he had always felt to the touch and I had just never known. Either way, it made both of us feel a little uncomfortable. Neck craned to further hide himself from me, I ran my eyes over the strands of his silver hair, now droopy, slicked against the back of his neck and along the edges of his face.

He spoke into the wind, in some hope that it would blow my way, if not at least crawl through the air to my ears. "I don't hate you," he whispered. "I really don't."

My teeth clenched as I rearranged my fingers a little on his shoulder. _I don't hate you. _

"It's just…" he began again. He heaved a long, burnt-out sigh. "…Before. I used to be so sure of myself and what I wanted to do in life. And I used to be so much better. But somewhere along the way – no."

I bit down on my lip and tried and failed to get a better glimpse of his face.

"No, I know exactly where – I sort of lost touch with what I thought my life would be. Everything changed. It's all like some sort of regression. Or progression, I don't know. All I do know is… you…"

He finally looked at me. He wasn't crying. But the way the raindrops had fallen on his ghostlike face, it looked like he had.

"Tenth, I had never felt so insecure until I met you."

As the first purr of thunder shook us, I could feel my heart sink. A little well of something began to press at my eyes from behind. I barely had any voice: "What do you mean?"

Remorse sucked some of the color out of his complexion, but he had a heavy sense about his head. He _needed _to go on.

"To be honest, Tenth, you confuse me." His chest slowly rose and fell once or twice before he continued. "And you, yourself, I thank for that. But this feeling like I've lost my identity is something I really just cannot stand anymore. It's something I need to deal with, Tenth."

The little white highlights in his eyes bounced around, and I suppose mine did too; in one swift movement unnoticed by the both of us until it was already done, we had grabbed each other at the waist and pulled into a warm and wet little hug, our heads on each other's shoulders. I shut my eyes, digging my fingers into his soaking dress shirt to hear the squish of the rainwater filing out through the pores of the cotton.

His lips were right by my ear. "I cannot change what has happened, for the past is set in stone," he said. "But I can change the future."

Enveloped in the comfort of the embrace, a paid little attention to this comment. In retrospect, I should have regarded it more. But what could I have done then? Truth be told, I was… a little confused, too.

He tapped me on the back twice, released me, turned away and walked back into his room. I nearly fell into the emptiness in front of me. Now thoroughly drenched and then shaken by a sudden bolt of lightning, I dragged myself back through his room, too, and out into the hallway, to return to the meeting without my right hand man.

As I walked by a window, I noticed that the light space in the distance had waned away to almost nothing.

The next day, Hayato was gone.

0o.o0o.o0

***Rosemary is an OC of mine, from another (yet to be updated because I suck TTATT) fic of mine. She's a fairly new member of the CEDEF, and she's not an assassin, but instead trained to be Tsuna's secretary. She's about the same age as Tsuna, and pretty much all you need to know is that she's Australian with red hair and glasses and she's really smart and good with computers. And she and Basil are together. Like, romantically. Yeah… **

**Anyway, like it so far? Blah, I know it sucks. Whatevs. At least I'm slowly climbing out of the spiraling pit of depression and fire and piranhas that is writer's block. :D **


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